Nollywood actor Uzor Arukwe has expressed reservations about marriage, arguing that women often shoulder greater responsibilities and make more personal sacrifices within the institution. The actor said his position was influenced by the demands associated with childbirth, changes in family identity and the expectations society places on women, raising questions about how responsibilities are shared between married couples.
Arukwe made the remarks during an appearance on the In My Opinion Podcast, featuring fellow Nollywood actress Bisola Aiyeola, in an episode released in October 2026. The discussion, which attracted fresh media attention on Wednesday, October 14, examined relationships, marriage and societal expectations. Arukwe explained that his reluctance to advocate strongly for marriage stemmed from his perception that women generally bear a heavier burden than men.
“I’ve never really been an advocate of marriage, because I feel like it’s more tasking for the woman,” the actor said, before referring to the responsibilities associated with childbirth and changes traditionally expected of women after marriage.
Arukwe pointed specifically to pregnancy and childbirth as examples of experiences that distinguish the responsibilities of women from those of men. He also mentioned the customary practice of women adopting their husbands' surnames, describing it as one of several changes that can accompany marriage.
“She’s the one that bears the child. She takes your last name. A lot of things happen,” he explained.
His comments reflected a broader discussion about whether the responsibilities associated with marriage are distributed fairly between partners. Rather than focusing on the ceremonial aspects of marriage, Arukwe addressed the personal adjustments and obligations that may follow the decision to establish a family.
The actor also questioned the pressure placed on individuals to marry within particular age ranges. He recalled growing up in an environment where remaining unmarried at 25 could attract questions from older relatives or other members of society.
According to him, comparisons between generations sometimes create expectations that younger adults should marry and begin raising children according to timelines established by their parents. Such expectations, he suggested, do not necessarily reflect individual circumstances or personal preferences.
Arukwe's observations highlighted the distinction between marriage as a social institution and marriage as a personal decision. While families and communities may attach importance to marital status, individuals can have different priorities concerning relationships, career development and parenthood.
During the conversation, the actor also acknowledged that not every woman wants to have children. He said he had personally encountered women who did not regard motherhood as part of their preferred future, illustrating the diversity of choices people make about family life.
His comments challenged the assumption that all women necessarily view marriage and childbirth as essential personal achievements. However, he did not present his observations as statistical evidence about women's preferences or as a universal description of every marriage.
The discussion also featured actress Bisola Aiyeola, who spoke about her own understanding of marriage and the pressures experienced by women who combine family responsibilities with employment and other obligations.
Aiyeola questioned situations in which women are expected to provide financially for their households while continuing to perform most domestic and childcare responsibilities. She suggested that such arrangements can leave women carrying an excessive share of the work involved in maintaining family life.
Her remarks addressed the practical responsibilities associated with marriage, including raising children, managing household activities and meeting financial needs. She argued that these demands can become particularly difficult when one partner is expected to perform several roles without sufficient assistance.
Aiyeola nevertheless distinguished criticism of unequal responsibilities from opposition to marriage itself. She described marriage as an important institution within society while explaining that becoming married was not the central objective of her personal life.
The actress said she remained open to marriage but did not consider it necessary to define her identity or determine whether she was satisfied with her achievements. Her position emphasised personal choice rather than a rejection of committed relationships.
Speaking about single parenthood, Aiyeola also acknowledged the challenges associated with raising a child without sharing everyday parenting responsibilities with another adult. She explained that she had discussed those realities with her daughter, stressing that the demands of parenting should not automatically fall on one person.
Her comments provided a related perspective to Arukwe's argument by examining how family responsibilities operate in practice. While Arukwe concentrated on the sacrifices he believes women make within marriage, Aiyeola addressed the pressures that can arise when domestic responsibilities are not adequately shared.
Together, their contributions formed part of a wider conversation about changing attitudes towards marriage among Nigerian adults. The discussion touched on traditional expectations, personal independence and the importance of recognising the responsibilities that accompany long-term relationships.
In many Nigerian communities, marriage remains an important family and cultural institution. Wedding ceremonies frequently involve extended families, religious communities and traditional practices, while expectations concerning married life can extend beyond the relationship between the two partners.
These traditions vary considerably across communities and households. Expectations about surnames, household responsibilities, employment and child-rearing are not uniform, and individual couples may choose different arrangements based on their circumstances and preferences.
The question of how couples divide domestic responsibilities has also received attention in international research. The International Labour Organization has documented differences in the amount of unpaid care work performed by women and men, identifying household responsibilities and caregiving as important considerations in discussions about gender equality.
Such findings provide broader context for conversations about unpaid work, although they do not establish the precise division of responsibilities in any particular marriage. Individual experiences depend on several factors, including employment, income, family support and the decisions made by partners.
Arukwe's comments were therefore an expression of his personal assessment rather than a conclusion that every married woman experiences greater difficulty than her husband. His remarks focused on responsibilities he believes are frequently overlooked when marriage is discussed as a social achievement.
The actor has developed a prominent career in Nigeria's film industry, appearing in productions that have brought him wider recognition among Nollywood audiences. His participation in the podcast placed him alongside Aiyeola in a discussion extending beyond their professional work as entertainers.
The In My Opinion Podcast regularly features conversations about relationships, cultural expectations and everyday experiences. Its October episodes with Arukwe and Aiyeola provided a platform for the two performers to discuss their views on marriage without presenting those opinions as universally applicable rules.
The discussion also raised the question of whether changing attitudes towards marriage necessarily indicate declining respect for the institution. Neither Arukwe's comments nor Aiyeola's observations established such a conclusion. Both focused on the responsibilities, expectations and personal decisions associated with married life.
For Arukwe, the central concern was the extent of the adjustments women may be expected to make, particularly in relation to childbirth and family identity. For Aiyeola, the emphasis was on ensuring that marriage does not become an arrangement in which one partner carries most of the responsibilities.
Their remarks reflect an ongoing conversation about partnership, shared obligations and individual choice. While views on marriage differ, the podcast discussion drew attention to the importance of considering its practical demands alongside the cultural significance traditionally attached to the institution.
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